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Six word political philosophies. Why not?

Smithmag is a story-telling website that is home to the well-known project Six-Word Memoirs.

This started with the apocryphal story that Ernest Hemingway was challenged in a bar (where else?) to write a short story in six words, to which he replied: "For sale. Baby shoes. Never worn."

Smithmag has opened this up to both celebrities and ordinary people, with often astounding results that you can read both on the site and in the new book.

My entry was "Twins, adoption, grandchild. Cats. Joyous chaos." Ok, Steve Colbert's "I really thought it was funny" is a lot better.

But, anyway, here's my thought: what about six-word political philosophies and candidate description?

Here's my first take on Libertarianism:

Government shouldn't pay mortgages, mandate helmets.


Not quite what I wanted; only a small part of the philosophy. Six words is tough.

Second try:

Live free or die. Still valid.


Still not satisfactory, but you get the idea. You could also use it to criticize a political philosophy, like Liberalism:

Cradle to grave Nanny suffocates me.


(To my progressive/liberal friends: not intended as a cheap shot; I just figured out that it is easier in six words to lampoon or criticize an idea in six words than to explain it.)

So in the interests of fair play, here's a critique of Libertarianism in six words:

No government. Gated communities. Children starve.


I was also thinking about political candidates.

Say, maybe, Barack Obama:

Change? Cheap talk or necessary medicine?


Perhaps McCain?

Straight talk's cheap when emulating Dubya.



So this is my challenge. I realize that this is not one of those blogs that generates hundreds of comments. but maybe I can get some of you to take a shot at:

Describing your own political ideology (or criticizing somebody else's).

Describing, criticizing, or even lampooning a current candidate or major political figure.

You get extra points if your description is so good that the six words will actually communicate the idea or person you're talking about. (I'm still working on that.)

Anybody game?

Comments

Anonymous said…
Steve I can describe my political philosophy succiently:

Liberty, Fraternity, Equality or Death.
Anonymous said…
Here's one for you:

"Leave me the fuck alone, please."

By the way, you'll be happy to know (maybe?) that reading your site has made me realize in many ways I may actually be more of a "libertarian" than a "liberal." Keep up the good work.
Anonymous said…
Oh, and here's my take on the political philosophy of Dave Anderson at FSP and those of his ilk.

"Gays can marry? Sky is falling."

"Equal protection only if we agree."
Bowly said…
I'll steal Roderick Long's Libertarianism In One Sentence: "Other people are not your property."

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